Author Archives: Julie S. Ong
“The desire of the man is for the woman, but the desire of the woman is for the desire of the man.”
~ Madame de Stael
“Love is the irresistible desire to be irresistibly desired.”
What is the sexiest organ in the body? You would be surprised to know that it is the brain. This is because the ability to imagine intimate scenarios and fantasies can be more stimulating than the sexual experience itself. Even the desire to be close to your lover activates endorphins in the brain. If you want to increase the energy of this organ, stay tuned for three simple additions to your meal plan that can enhance your sexual desire.
With more nerve cells in your gut than in the central nervous system, the intestines and brain are intimately connected. Often referred to as the second brain, the intestines can provide guidance (“gut feelings”) for the answers we are seeking. To nourish the lower half of the body, include these three simple basics:
1. Whole Grains
Whole grains contain the all vital energy of the plant, which nourishes all levels of mind, body, and spirit. Energetically balanced, whole grains are grounding and help center your whole being from the inside out, achieving peace and harmony. Thus, including whole grains in your regime not only nourishes your sexual health but also the quality of your relationship.
2. Brown Rice
Brown rice is the specific whole grain which has complete balanced carbohydrates, fats, proteins, and minerals. Its stabilizing energy helps ground the core of the body (hara region) and supports organs in the lower part of the body like the reproductive organs.
3. Pressure Cooking
Cooking also transmutes healing energy into your food. Pressure cooking whole grains like brown rice adds warming, strengthening energy which further nourishes the lower region of the body, like the intestines.
The word desire comes from Latin, meaning “from the stars,” pointing to the hidden spiritual forces behind our desires. So, amping up the energy of your brain and intestines increases not only your sexual desire but also enhances your connection to your intuitive power.
A loving heart is the beginning of all knowledge.
Do all things with love.
Want to find love fast and keep love forever? Because expressions of love and gratitude are so important in a long term relationship, one way to jump start your love life is by reconnecting with Love. Preparing food from your heart is an ideal way to connect with loving energy, so the best time to do this is when you are washing your whole grains. To enhance your connection with Love, remember to open up your heart to joyful experiences.
The process of washing brown rice is an ideal opportunity to harmonize with Nature and revitalize loving energy. The more you cultivate Love, the more you will experience it. The love you add to your food is the secret ingredient to a long lasting, loving relationship.
Learn how to wash brown rice in this video. As you caress the grains of rice, feel love and gratitude for your food. Take a few moments to do these exercises to help you notice a shift in your energy:
- What sensations do you notice in your body? Is there tightness in your shoulder muscles? Or are you relaxed and at ease?
- What emotions are coming up for you? Are you feeling fearful or anxious? Or do you feel peaceful and loving?
- What thoughts are you having? Are you distracted by the past? Or are you focused on the present moment?
Remember, Love attracts Love. So, the more you express love and gratitude, the more your relationship will evolve into a deeper, richer experience, even an exciting eternal love affair.
Healthy Relationship Tip
In some languages, the word love can be expressed in many ways. For example, in Greek, there are many words for different kinds of love:
- Eros means “passionate, romantic love” with sensuous longing, such as in dating or marriage.
- Philia means “friendship” between family or friends.
- Agapē means “love” in reference to general affection, such as for a good meal, one’s offspring, or one’s spouse.
- Storge means “natural affection” used exclusively for one’s children or family.
- Thelema means “desire,” such as to be occupied with something.
Love is the universal language that transcends time. So, to find love fast and keep love forever, start by finding how many ways you can say “I love you” to your Beloved.
“In love the paradox occurs that two beings become one and yet remain two.”
Wondering how to rekindle your relationship and spark your physical connection? Ready to try something new? It’s time to think about what you’re eating and how it affects your libido, hormones, and sex drive. There are five diets you should avoid if you want to rediscover more magic in the bedroom.
Contrary to popular belief, simply taking pills or undergoing costly surgery for a quick fix is not the answer to regaining youthful sexual energy. In fact, pills and surgery can actually weaken your kidneys and reproductive organs, depleting your sex drive. The most reliable long-term solution for a healthy libido is adhering to a macrobiotic diet and avoiding the foods that cool down your libido.
Not only is it important to choose nutritious organic whole grains and vegetables, they must also be balanced energetically. To strengthen your reproductive organs and boost sexual energy, avoid these five diets at all costs:
1. Raw Foods
Today, the raw food movement is very popular. Raw foods, like fruits, salads, and smoothies, are cleansing and cooling to the body, and refreshing in hot weather. However, if eaten long term, they can put out your “digestive fire” and disperse internal warmth. Soups and stews cooked over a flame warm you from the inside out, especially in the winter, fueling the internal fires of passion, libido, and creativity.
2. Vegan Diets
Many people believe that avoiding meat is the answer to health and long life, but it doesn’t do much for your sex drive. A vegan diet can even be ungrounded and destabilizing, if you include sugar, processed food, or poor quality fats. An all-vegetable diet has cooling properties, which can be refreshing in hot weather, but its cleansing properties can deplete your body over the long term. Depending on your condition, including warming foods, such as fish once a week, can help balance the cooling quality of vegetables.
3. Atkins-like Diets
Although the warming quality of meat helps to balance the cooling energy of vegetable ingredients, over consumption of meat—such as with diets based on the Atkins or “Cave Man” model—can cause serious health problems. Because it stimulates the adrenal glands, meat brings a jolt to the kidneys, which can weaken the reproductive organs over time and gradually lower your sex drive. A meat-centric diet can also clog your arteries and lead to impotence.
4. Lacto-ovo Vegetarian Foods
If you avoid meat but eat a lacto-ovo vegetarian diet, you’ll find that dairy and eggs can create mucous congestion in the reproductive organs. Heavy, high-fat dairy products may also lead to weight gain or obesity, which can cause reduced sex drive.
5. Yogic/Ayurvedic Diets
An Ayurvedic diet was traditionally used by yogis for meditation and to suppress sexuality. High in cooling foods, it focuses heavily on dairy products, spices, and tropical fruits. While this diet is good for those who live in tropical countries, it’s too extreme for temperate climates and can weaken sexual function.
A healthy diet not only helps to cleanse the body, it also revitalizes all of your organs and creates greater sexual energy and vibrancy. A macrobiotic diet of cooked whole grains, vegetables, and a little fish is the perfect regime to strengthen reproductive organs while warming the body from the inside out.
Healthy Relationship Tip
Redefine the word friend. A friend is literally a lover, as the root of the word friend comes from Old English, meaning to love. Even in Latin and Greek, the word for friend and I love are related. So, the next time you call someone your friend, remember that he or she is also your Beloved.
Ready to spice up your love life? We all know that chewing is an important part of healthy digestion. But did you know that how you chew can affect the quality of your relationships as well?
Chewing not only improves your digestion and reduces risks of illness and disease, it can also boost your sexual health and deepen the intensity of your relationship. This is because how you absorb foods impacts your sexual vitality. Here are 5 eating-related lifestyle adjustments you can make to improve your digestion and revive your sex life:
1. Eat at regular times
A regular mealtime schedule brings rhythm and balance to your daily routine. When your digestion functions on a predictable cycle, you are in harmony with the natural order, and your relationships with people, animals, food, and yourself are more nurturing.
2. Sit down to eat
The stress of eating on the go–running, standing, driving, doing business, concentrating, and reading–can lead to ulcers and poor digestion. Sit down to eat and avoid multi-tasking. Mindfully eating allows you to fully enjoy your meal and your partner’s company without distraction. This simple step not only improves digestion, but also cultivates gratitude for your food and relationship.
3. Chew more
Digestion begins in the mouth. Amylase enzyme in saliva breaks down carbohydrates so the body can more easily absorb them. The more you chew, the more complex carbohydrates (like brown rice) are converted into simple sugars and become naturally sweeter. Chewing foods 50-100 times not only improves digestion, it also allows you to more easily embrace the sweetness in life, including being with your partner.
4. Eat a moderate volume of food
Skipping meals, dieting, overeating, or under eating can all weaken your digestion, which becomes overworked and exhausted. Eating a moderate amount of food restores digestive function and boosts sexual vitality as you absorb more nutrients and energy.
5. Stick to whole foods
Over time, eating rich, heavy, or greasy foods, such as meat and hydrogenated oils, burdens digestion and blocks sexual function. Cooked whole foods, like leafy greens and grains, nourish digestion, help cleanse the body, and revitalize your reproductive organs.
Healthy digestion not only strengthens your body from the inside out, your relationships will become sweeter as well. Happy chewing!
If a man be sensible and one fine morning, while he is lying in bed, count at the tips of his fingers how many things in this life truly will give him enjoyment, invariably he will find food is the first one.
Eat with the fingers, drink with the nose.
~Joseph Delteil, ‘La Cuisine paleolithique’ (1964)
In some countries, like India, the art of eating with your hands is viewed as a sensual experience. By involving as many of the senses as possible–sight, touch, smell, and taste–you not only deepen your relationship with food, you can also reconnect with your partner on a sensual level.
Next time you sit down to a meal with your partner make it “fingers only.” Reconnect with each other on a more intimate level by feeding each other healthy finger food. Here are three finger foods to romance your lover:
1. Sexy “finger food” includes desserts and elaborate fruits
- Vegan chocolate covered strawberries
- Peeled grapes
- Vegan coconut macaroons
- Chopped dates rolled into balls and covered in coconut
2. Healthy bite sized “finger food” includes appetizers and snacks
- Mushrooms stuffed with grain and nut pilaf
- Pita pizza baked with squash sauce and veggies
- Whole wheat crackers spread with walnut and roasted mushroom pate
- Greens rolls or sushi filled with grains and veggies
- Spring rolls and dumplings
- Bite sized tempeh sandwiches
3. Foods that are dipped into a savory sauce or dressing
- Veggies dipped in pumpkin seed sauce
- Spring salad greens dipped in vinaigrette
- Green or black olives dipped in hummus
This Valentine’s Day, design a romantic “lovers only” meal using finger foods. You will not only enrich your connection with your food, you will also nurture a more intimate relationship with your partner.
All four elements were happening in equal measure – the cuisine, the wine, the service, and the overall ambiance. It taught me that dining could happen at a spiritual level.
Too many people just eat to consume calories. Try dining for a change.
Want to stick to your holistic meal plan and eat well while dining out? If you already eat vibrant, exciting foods that give you more energy, you may wonder what to eat when you’re out at parties. Even dining with family who may not understand your food choices can be frustrating.
So, what kinds of choices can you make from what’s being served on the table? Here are some things you can do to nurture your body and soul at parties:
1. Come out of the holistic closet
Here’s an opportunity to speak from your heart. Before you go to a party, tell your host that you are choosing healthier foods to eat at parties. Tell him or her about your new lifestyle and offer suggestions for substitutes, such as using whole grain bread for stuffing instead of white bread. It’s a chance for your host to incorporate healthier versions into the meal and learn more about healthier ways of eating. Often at gatherings, people will prefer the healthier version over the regular holiday fare.
2. Take a plate of food to share
Besides making sure you have something to eat, sharing a dish says, “I made this and it’s a part of my new lifestyle, and I’d love to have you try it.” People are open to new ways of eating, and they’re excited to try new foods. It’s a chance for you to share something of yourself in the spirit of the holidays.
3. Eat before you go
Sometimes bringing food is not an option, such as when you are eating at a restaurant. Having a bite to eat before you leave the house helps you eat less at the party and gives you more time to socialize, instead of worrying about what food to eat. This is a stress-free, healthier alternative to eating what will be served at the party.
Instead of being limited by food choices when dining out, you have many opportunities to eat well during the holidays. You can even become a catalyst for helping other people make healthier choices. You are a positive force for change; it all depends on the attitude you bring.
This is my wish for you: peace of mind, prosperity through the year, happiness that multiplies, health for you and yours, fun around every corner, energy to chase your dreams, joy to fill your holidays!
Are you having an energized, exciting holiday season? Or do you feel sluggish and exhausted, barely making it through the entire day? If you feel tired and run down, you may be eating traditional holiday food and this kind of food depletes your energy.
If you want to feel stress-free and more energized, here are some things you can do to kick the holiday food habit and have an energized, vibrant, exciting holiday season:
1. Eat in moderation
The key is moderation, because when you overindulge, you become more susceptible to disease. Instead of filling your plate, choose a few items from the healthier dishes on the table and eat a smaller amount.
2. Eat energizing, exciting foods
During the holidays, you can tend to eat lots of rich, heavy, high fat holiday foods over a short period of time, which can shut down your digestion. When your digestion becomes compromised, your body becomes exhausted, and you feel tired and sluggish. If you want more energy without overdosing on caffeine, eat energizing, exciting macrobiotic foods. For example, use healthy substitutes for heavy, high fat ingredients, such as using almond milk instead cream.
3. Eat according to the season
During the holidays, the weather becomes colder. So, you adjust by wearing warmer clothes and putting on the heat. Remember to include warming seasonal foods in your routine, as well. When you eat seasonal foods, you’re less susceptible to colds. By eating foods that are warming, like soups, stews, and root vegetables, rather than cooling raw salads, you increase internal warmth and strengthen your immune system to fight colds and flu.
When you have a nutrition plan in place, you will not only make better food choices, you will also have more energy and stamina to get through the holidays. Wishing you a healthy, happy, holiday season!
Love is of all passions the strongest, for it attacks simultaneously the head, the heart and the senses.
Sex without love is as hollow and ridiculous as love without sex.
~Hunter S. Thompson
Are you ready to ignite the passion in the bedroom? Want to activate some sexual healing? Nurturing an intimate, loving relationship with your partner begins with your health. When you are whole in body, mind, emotions, and spirit, your love life also becomes more fulfilling. The best way to spark your love life is by eating healthy whole foods.
Whole foods, like vegetables, contain vital life force energy or “chi” which supports and nourishes you on all levels. This chi is what revitalizes your overall health.Whole vegetables include all portions of a vegetable: the greens, center, and roots.
1. Leafy greens
Collards, kale, and dandelion greens have upward growing, expansive energy that supports the upper half of the body, like the heart. Leafy greens help you open up to love and joy and improve social communication.
2. Round vegetables
Round vegetables represent the balance point between the root and greens. This is the center of the plant, which has stabilizing energy that nourishes the middle organs in the body. Foods with centering energy are round vegetables like squash, cabbage, and onion. These foods are naturally sweet and allow you to embrace the sweetness in life, like enjoying being with your partner.
3. Root vegetables
Root vegetables grow downward and have grounding energy. This strengthening energy nourishes the lower half of the body, including the reproductive organs for increased sexual vitality. Examples of root vegetables are carrot, burdock, parsnip, and kuzu root. The hardy nature of root vegetables brings an enduring quality to your relationship.
Whether you want to improve communication or boost sexual vitality, eating whole foods can activate bliss on many dimensions. When you are whole on all levels, your love life improves as well.
Healthy Relationship Tip
Expressing your feelings to your partner helps him or her understand your perspective while opening up lines of communication. When expressing your feelings, use the “I feel” technique.
The “I Feel” Technique
- Begin by stating how you feel. Remember to focus on expressing emotion (“I feel . . . “) rather than belief (“I feel that . . .”).
- Be specific in describing your emotions. Instead of using words like “upset,” use descriptive emotions like “angry,” “sad,” “frustrated,” or “irritated.”
- Identify the situation that is a trigger. Instead of blaming, state what it is about the situation that is creating the emotion. (“I feel frustrated when you . . .”)
The first step is to express your emotions and validate your feelings. This is the beginning of discovering what your story or belief is about the way things “should be” that triggered your reaction.
Not eating enough whole grains? Incorporating whole grains into your diet can be challenging when you have a busy schedule and no time to cook. Because they contain intact fiber, whole grains provide complex carbohydrates for energy while keeping blood glucose levels steady throughout the day.
Polished grains, like white rice, are digested very quickly and absorbed immediately into the bloodstream, spiking your blood glucose level, which then falls suddenly, leading to a “crash.” These erratic highs and lows of blood glucose levels contribute to diabetes, weight gain, depression, and a host of other conditions.
Traditional cultures used healing whole grains everyday in stews, soups, and salads. You can balance your diet by adding whole grains to your recipes in one week with the 7 Day Whole Grain Challenge.
Day 1: Shopping Day
Choose 2-3 whole grain recipes, make a list of ingredients, and shop! When you get home, soak grains overnight as prep for the next day’s recipe. Experiment with a variety of grains besides the staple brown rice: barley, quinoa, oat groats, amaranth, etc.
Day 2: Prep ‘n Cook Day
Cook grains and chop veggies while grains are cooking. Boil water and blanch veggies for a quick meal.
Day 3: Leftovers
Want an easy way to eat whole grains at work? Turn leftover grain into a delicious grain salad. Stir in umeboshi vinegar, olive oil, chopped scallions, and grated carrot. Take your salad to work for a healthy lunch. Before you leave, prepare another grain for soaking while you are at work. When you return home, your grain is ready to be cooked.
Day 4: Whole Grains on the Go
No time to make a whole grain lunch? Find Asian restaurants near your work and call to see which one serves brown rice. Order a delicious lunch of brown rice and sautéed veggies…and ta da! A fast and easy way to have a whole grain lunch.
Day 5: Quick Cooking Quinoa
Quick-cooking, protein-packed quinoa takes 15 minutes to cook. Keep in the fridge and mix with chopped blanched veggies for easy lunches and dinners (cook 1 cup quinoa in 2 cups water or broth, season with shoyu soy sauce).
Want to take whole grains on trips? Make your own healthy “happy” meals! Stuff nori sheets with seasoned grains and blanched veggies and roll up to make sushi. Or roll seasoned grains into balls, stuff with a little umeboshi plum, and cover with nori sheets.
Day 7: Chewing Experiment
Have a sweet tooth? Chew each bite at least 20 times. You’ll be surprised at how sweet your whole grains become. Added benefits include better digestion and a relaxing and satisfying feeling!
Healthy Relationship Tip
Widen your definition of food. Think about this: Food includes more than just what you eat. Loving relationships, satisfying careers, spiritual growth, and exercise feed you in more ways than whole grains and veggies alone. This wholistic way of living is your primary food.
Learn to let your intuition—gut instinct—tell you when the food, the relationship, the job isn’t good for you (and conversely, when what you’re doing is just right).
But the most exciting, challenging and significant relationship of all is the one you have with yourself. And if you can find someone to love the you you love, well, that’s just fabulous.
~Carrie on Sex and the City
Who is your significant other? The answer may surprise you. Your relationships include your relationship with nature, people, pets, career, money, food, and anything else with which you form an attachment. How you experience these relationships is a reflection of the greatest relationship in your life–your relationship with yourself. Because eating is an everyday ritual, your relationship with food is an important reflection or mirror of your relationship with yourself.
Your life experiences are based on your perception of these events. It all begins with your view of yourself. Are you living authentically or are you living by other people’s beliefs? You can find the answer to this question by looking at your relationships. Are your relationships supportive? Do they have healthy boundaries? Or do your relationships bring up inner fears? By deconstructing your stories or limiting beliefs behind your fears, you can find out more about yourself and how to listen to your inner voice instead of following other people’s stories.
Your relationship with food can also reveal limiting beliefs about yourself. If you choose foods that distort thinking, such as alcohol, this may suggest that you want to avoid facing your fears. Mindful eating without distractions allows you to focus on the present moment and nourish your inner voice. Then you honor and respect not only the food you are eating but also yourself.
Healthy Relationship Tip
To connect with your partner and yourself on a more profound level, follow this exercise:
- Sit crossed legged in front of your partner. Say three things you appreciate about your partner.
- Your partner says three things he or she appreciates about you.
- You say three things you appreciate about yourself.
- Your partner says three things he or she appreciates about himself or herself.
This exercise allows your partner to hear how you value him or her. You also hear how your partner values you, and you both hear how you value yourselves.