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Chew Your Way to Love

Ready to spice up your love life? We all know that chewing is an important part of healthy digestion. But did you know that how you chew can affect the quality of your relationships as well?

Chewing not only improves your digestion and reduces risks of illness and disease, it can also boost your sexual health and deepen the intensity of your relationship. This is because how you absorb foods impacts your sexual vitality. Here are 5 eating-related lifestyle adjustments you can make to improve your digestion and revive your sex life:

1. Eat at regular times

A regular mealtime schedule brings rhythm and balance to your daily routine. When your digestion functions on a predictable cycle, you are in harmony with the natural order, and your relationships with people, animals, food, and yourself are more nurturing.

2. Sit down to eat

The stress of eating on the go–running, standing, driving, doing business, concentrating, and reading–can lead to ulcers and poor digestion. Sit down to eat and avoid multi-tasking. Mindfully eating allows you to fully enjoy your meal and your partner’s company without distraction. This simple step not only improves digestion, but also cultivates gratitude for your food and relationship.

3. Chew more

Digestion begins in the mouth. Amylase enzyme in saliva breaks down carbohydrates so the body can more easily absorb them. The more you chew, the more complex carbohydrates (like brown rice) are converted into simple sugars and become naturally sweeter. Chewing foods 50-100 times not only improves digestion, it also allows you to more easily embrace the sweetness in life, including being with your partner.

4. Eat a moderate volume of food

Skipping meals, dieting, overeating, or under eating can all weaken your digestion, which becomes overworked and exhausted. Eating a moderate amount of food restores digestive function and boosts sexual vitality as you absorb more nutrients and energy.

5. Stick to whole foods

Over time, eating rich, heavy, or greasy foods, such as meat and hydrogenated oils, burdens digestion and blocks sexual function. Cooked whole foods, like leafy greens and grains, nourish digestion, help cleanse the body, and revitalize your reproductive organs.

Healthy digestion not only strengthens your body from the inside out, your relationships will become sweeter as well. Happy chewing!

Are you ready to boost sexual vitality?

Love is of all passions the strongest, for it attacks simultaneously the head, the heart and the senses.
~Lao-Tzu

Sex without love is as hollow and ridiculous as love without sex.
~Hunter S. Thompson

Are you ready to ignite the passion in the bedroom? Want to activate some sexual healing? Nurturing an intimate, loving relationship with your partner begins with your health. When you are whole in body, mind, emotions, and spirit, your love life also becomes more fulfilling. The best way to spark your love life is by eating healthy whole foods.

Whole foods, like vegetables, contain vital life force energy or “chi” which supports and nourishes you on all levels. This chi is what revitalizes your overall health.Whole vegetables include all portions of a vegetable: the greens, center, and roots.

1. Leafy greens

Collards, kale, and dandelion greens have upward growing, expansive energy that supports the upper half of the body, like the heart. Leafy greens help you open up to love and joy and improve social communication.

2. Round vegetables

Round vegetables represent the balance point between the root and greens. This is the center of the plant, which has stabilizing energy that nourishes the middle organs in the body. Foods with centering energy are round vegetables like squash, cabbage, and onion. These foods are naturally sweet and allow you to embrace the sweetness in life, like enjoying being with your partner.

3. Root vegetables

Root vegetables grow downward and have grounding energy. This strengthening energy nourishes the lower half of the body, including the reproductive organs for increased sexual vitality. Examples of root vegetables are carrot, burdock, parsnip, and kuzu root. The hardy nature of root vegetables brings an enduring quality to your relationship.

Whether you want to improve communication or boost sexual vitality, eating whole foods can activate bliss on many dimensions. When you are whole on all levels, your love life improves as well.

Healthy Relationship Tip

Expressing your feelings to your partner helps him or her understand your perspective while opening up lines of communication. When expressing your feelings, use the “I feel” technique.

The “I Feel” Technique

  • Begin by stating how you feel. Remember to focus on expressing emotion (“I feel . . . “) rather than belief (“I feel that . . .”).
  • Be specific in describing your emotions. Instead of using words like “upset,” use descriptive emotions like “angry,” “sad,” “frustrated,” or “irritated.”
  • Identify the situation that is a trigger. Instead of blaming, state what it is about the situation that is creating the emotion. (“I feel frustrated when you . . .”)

The first step is to express your emotions and validate your feelings. This is the beginning of discovering what your story or belief is about the way things “should be” that triggered your reaction.

Embracing the Beloved

There comes a time in the seeker’s life when he discovers that he is at once the lover and the beloved.
~Sri Chinmoy

Are you ready to kindle your soul and embrace the sacredness of life on all levels of your being? Any time you spend in the wild is an opportunity to develop an intimate relationship with nature. As you begin to trust the relationship, the healing energy of nature merges with your being, and you become more open to receiving universal energy.

A relationship with nature is no different than a relationship with a person. If you have a lover, then you want to spend time with him or her. The more time you spend together, the closer you two become until, eventually, you begin to trust the relationship. You begin to relax into the arms of your lover, and you move in sync together. Does this sound familiar?

In the beginning, a new relationship is a little scary and exciting all at the same time. Perhaps you are meeting someone for the first time, and you are not sure how to behave. Can you relate to this? Likewise, this same feeling happens when you go out into the wild. In the beginning, it’s very powerful, but it may be a little scary as well. These feelings mean that a powerful potential exists, that something really magical can happen.

As you develop a profound and loving relationship with nature, you will feel more open. Take a moment and lie down in nature, and feel yourself let go. Pay attention to any sense of discomfort and be open to it.

  1. Ground yourself by connecting with your body. Are there any places where you feel tension? Tension may appear as shallow breathing from holding diaphragmatic muscles tight.
  2. If the body is contracted, this is will be reflected in the mind and emotions which are also contracted. What emotions do you have? How do you feel?
  3. What thoughts are you having?

If you trust it and give it time, go back into the wild on a regular basis. Your relationship with nature will open and flower, deepening along with mystery of life. Embracing what you love opens up a profound path of healing from the inside out. So, developing a relationship with nature is really about developing a relationship with yourself.

Embracing Nature

Everybody needs beauty as well as bread, places to play in and pray in, where nature may heal and give strength to body and soul.
~John Muir

Do you have a favorite place to play in nature? Nature provides many places in which you can both play and pray. Tension dissolves as you embrace nature, which is the natural state of oneness with the present moment. By strengthening your awareness of the present moment, you can cultivate a deeper connection to nature. Your senses are the secret to connecting with universal energy for healing in body, mind, and spirit.

In the blog “Walking Meditation,” I spoke about the importance of mindfulness. Mindfulness is the profound ability to perceive present awareness. This is the process of unlearning the habit of focusing on past and future. Instead, you learn to focus on one thing at a time without being overwhelmed by distractions. The more time you spend in present awareness, the more you become aware of subtle distractions. As these distractions drop away, your awareness of the present moment deepens. Bliss, joy, and happiness manifest. These are nature’s gifts that come with cultivation of mindfulness.

Embracing nature in the present moment is how you cultivate your connection with the outer world. Your energy is constantly exchanging with nature and vice versa. For example, nature provides food for your sustenance, and this food is eventually returned to the outer world. Can you see how boundaries are self-imposed?

You can turn around your everyday mindset of separation with nature through your senses. Every sense organ can become a doorway to an experience of natural connection. Close your eyes and take a moment to smell your food. What does this smell remind you of? For example, when I smell sea vegetables, I am immediately connected with the ocean. I imagine the waves crashing on the beach, pelicans gliding over the water, and boats sailing on the horizon. Through my sense of smell, I experience myself as being part of the whole family of life. Can you see how everything experienced through your senses connects you with the outer world?

By cultivating present awareness through your senses, you connect with Mother Earth. This pathway of coming into union with nature connects you to universal energy. The best part is, your meridians (energy pathways) begin to open as blockages are dissolved, bringing organ systems back into balance to create a healthy long life.

Cleansing Your Aura

Eventually you will come to understand that love heals everything, and love is all there is.
~Gary Zukav

Today, people believe their thoughts are their own, quickly choosing words and speaking without showing proper respect to the spiritual origin of the thoughts. However, all thoughts are not your own; they are from the spiritual realm.

You transmit your thoughts into the universe like a radio signal. Other people can pick up these signals and react to your thoughts. You may even react to other people’s thoughts. If you are sensitive to other people’s thoughts, you may feel drained around someone whose aura (energy field) is heavy and dark. Cleansing your own aura can help you feel lighter and more receptive to universal energy.

Because your thoughts make up your energy field, you can keep your aura clear with positive thinking (affirmations). Choose your words carefully. Before you speak, feel those words in your heart and know they convey the truth. Then you can speak the words from your heart, allowing universal energy to flow through you.

If you come into contact with someone who has limiting thoughts, use sacred rituals to cleanse your aura:

1. Visualization

Close your eyes and imagine your aura becoming cleansed with showers of white light.

2. Burn Sage or Incense

Fire and smoke have cleansing power. They have the ability to alter the energetic field of a person or a space.

3. Spiritual Thought

Chanting, meditation, or prayers, which invoke your spiritual source, have the power to attract assistance in achieving your goal.

4. Loving Shield

Love heals all things, so imagine yourself surrounded by a protective loving shield.

5. Water

Water symbolizes new birth and change. It cleanses your energetic fields on all levels, recharging the mind, body, and spirit.

6. Nature

The easiest way to cleanse your aura and ground yourself is to connect with Mother Earth. Use natural elemental forces in food and plants to brighten the energy in a space.

7. Animals

Intuitively, animals can pick up your thoughts and emotions. With their unconditional love, they help bring you back to the present moment.

In your journal, make a list of inner and outer resources that help ground you when you feel tense. Inner resources may be meditation, humor, or prayer. Outer resources may be writing in a letter, listening to music, or taking a walk. Finally, write positive evidence that validates your ability to stay in your own energy. Remember, you’re a work in progress, so enjoy the journey!

Loving What Is

Resistance is thought transformed into feeling. Change the thought that creates the resistance, and there is no more resistance.
~Robert Conklin

Is it difficult for you to love yourself and openly express your truth? Holding onto the past and feeling unfulfilled can be a safe route for you, if that is what you are familiar with. But to life your life to the fullest, your success lies in releasing resistance and staying in your authentic energy.

If you choose to hold onto grievances, you fulfill a story of yourself, which is that you are limited, worthless, unloved, etc. Focusing on your limitations can help you stay in your comfort zone. However, resistance is often an indicator that your true needs are not being met. This is an unnatural state, because you are not living your truth and energy is blocked. Have you ever heard of a flower saying, “I cannot grow today, because I’m not good enough?”

Yet, when you focus on your inner beauty and unlimited potential, you surrender to BEING and your potential expands. If you want to be greater than your self-image, ask yourself what is holding you back, and speak your truth about what you really want. Are you ready to let go of past grievances and live your dream?

Remember, thought is the precursor of manifestation, so think yourself into your dream–visualize the story that represents your truth. Ask yourself what is the path of loving what is and go with the flow. My client, Lumina, did just that, transforming a limiting situation into a beautiful journey of healing and self-acceptance.

Ready to begin a sacred relationship with herself, Lumina received divine guidance telling her that uterine cancer (BeaUterine cAnswer) was the beautiful answer. Here was her opportunity to walk her path and connect with Love. Through macrobiotic cooking, Lumina was able to reach inside herself for the answer to healing. This was a transformative experience that allowed her ultimately to love herself.

“I had no idea that literally letting go of crap would also be a letting go of ‘crap’ on so many levels,” she says. “That night, subconsciously I wanted so badly to hold onto all that I felt was holding me together. Where would I be without my angers, fears, heartaches and resentments? Who am I without all the walls and protection? I’ve learned that without them I am nowhere near empty or dead but am full, whole and more alive than I have been in years. Being able to still love myself through all of my fears, angers and resentments I’ve found that I can love my family with theirs and that today, tomorrow or next lifetime-I will be there for them. That old vision of payback is no longer where I get another day’s strength to go on without the support of my family. It’s the new vision of my heart no longer being broken that gives me all of that and more.”

Through the blessing of cancer, she chose to manage her thoughts and behaviors to align with her truth. By acknowledging that her old stories were no longer serving her, she could release them. She chose new stories that more accurately reflected her inner beauty and unlimited potential. Her blog (http://www.beauterinecanswer.com/) is her way of journaling positive evidence that reflects this new change in perception.

Lumina’s journey shows that life is about choices, not chances. It really is very simple; it’s about being open to living your dream. And don’t worry about what other people think of you, just think about what you want. Life is an exercise in staying in your own authenticity.

Healing Inner Child

My sister came rushing into the room. “Where are the things in the garage that I was going to give to my friend’s husband?” She was agitated and upset.

“I thought they were garbage so I threw them out,” I said.

She shook her head. “I’m working on cleaning out the garage. That’s my project. See? I have everything organized, so I know what to give away and where everything goes.”

“Tell him I’m sorry. I didn’t know,” I said.

After she left, I re-lived that event over and over in my mind, feeling defeated. I felt as if I had done something wrong. What I was actually doing was experiencing the event as real through my perception.

Because you determine what is real through your perceptions, you may also hold onto the past by re-living experiences in your life. As if they were purple hearts won on the battle field with your suffering, you pledge allegiance to memories of hurts, identifying with them, and building your life around them. You may think that the past is who you are. Yet, the past is only what you remember and is subjective based on your perception. The past is filtered through your thoughts and feelings when the event occurred and becomes real when you re-live it over and over again. Doesn’t it wrench your heart out when you tell people about something so meaningful that happened in the past, but they don’t even remember or acknowledge it? Time is an idea held in the human mind, so when you allow a shift in perception to change your experience, the past changes, too, which allows you to let go of your need to hold on to the past. Playing with your inner child—recreation (re-creation)—allows you to heal that place of hurt in your soul. By re-living the event the way you would want it to happen, you can re-create new energy that you carry and perceive as real.

If I re-lived the event the way I had wanted it to happen, my experience would be different and my feelings would change. That I felt defensive when my sister scolded me showed me that I had metaphorically handed my power over to her. When I perceived myself as powerless, she treated me as such because she was mirroring my energy. Whether my sister was upset or not was irrelevant to how I perceived the event. I was acting as if I had been scolded, so the experience of being scolded became a reality for me. She could be upset based on her perception of the event, but how did I want to re-live the experience? I decided to act as if she had no power over me and I hadn’t been scolded. I immediately felt better as the new reality became my experience.

When I saw my sister later in the kitchen, I said, “You’re doing a great job with the garage.”

She looked grateful for the encouragement. “Thanks,” she said. She gave me a hug. “I moved some things against the wall, so it’s coming along.”

We were bonding once again on a more aligned level.

Recipe for Success: Changing Perception and Recreating the Past

Think of a situation you would like to re-create. List in order the events that occurred. Then answer the following questions in your journal.

  1. How are you feeling?
  2. What was your perception of the events?
  3. How did you hand over your power? What was happening before the situation occurred?
  4. What do you want to experience now? What is your power, your truth?
  5. What thoughts can help you shift your perception? What can you say to yourself to help you perceive the situation differently? What is the truth of the event?
  6. What is your next action to reclaim your power? What guidance are you receiving?
  7. What intention can you set before the next event?

You may have learned to hold on to your past and identify with your experiences, even feeling shame or sadness which brings on suffering. You may have not learned to forgive yourself very well. However, through forgiveness, you can release yourself from your perceived images and realize your true nature, which creates itself as “new” in every moment. To learn something, you must teach it; as you hear yourself speak your truth, you become the truth, because you are what you think. The more you speak your truth, the more you grow closer and closer to your true nature. Every action and thought focused on the absolute source brings you back in alignment with universal truth. This is one very powerful way to achieve balance, to avoid suffering, and to become centered and eternally at peace.

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